The Biology Teacher

Unknown

A professor stood before his class of twenty biology students, about to hand out the final exam. "I want to say that it has been a pleasure teaching you this year. I know you have all worked extremely hard. Anyone who would like to opt out of the final exam today will receive a 'B' for the course.

“There was much rejoicing in the class as students got up, walked to the front of the class, and took the professor up on his offer. As the last taker left the room, the professor looked out over the handful of remaining students and asked,
"Anyone else? This is your last chance."

One final student rose up and opted out of the final. The professor closed the door and took attendance of those still remaining.

"I'm glad to see you believe in yourselves," he said. "You all get 'A's."

Words of Advice from Bill Gates (By Bill Gates)

Life is wonderful, but it is also challenging at times. The following advice comes from one of the most successful businessman in history, Bill Gates. He recently told a group of high schoolers about 11 things they did not learn in school. He talks about how feel-good, politically correct teachings created a full generation of kids with no concept of reality and how this concept set them up for failure in the real world. I want all of you to be very successful, so consider some of his words:

Rule 1: Life is not fair - get used to it.

Rule 2: The world won't care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself.

Rule 3: You will NOT make 40 thousand dollars a year right out of high school. You won't be a vice-president with a car phone, until you earn both.

Rule 4: If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss. He doesn't have tenure.

Rule 5: Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your grandparents had a different word for burger flipping; they called it opportunity.

Rule 6: If you mess up, it's not your parents' fault, so don't whine about your mistakes, learn from them.

Rule 7: Before you were born, your parents weren't as boring as they are now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes and listening to you talk about how cool you are. So before you save the rain forest from the parasites of your parents' generation, try delousing the closet in your own room.

Rule 8: Your school may have done away with winners and losers but life has not. In some schools they have abolished failing grades and they'll give you as many times as you want to get the right answer. This doesn't bear the slightest resemblance to ANYTHING in real life.

Rule 9: Life is not divided into semesters. You don't get summers off and very few employers are interested in helping you to find yourself. Do that on your own time.

Rule 10: Television is NOT real life. In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.

Rule 11: Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one.

--There may be virtual reality, but there is no such thing as virtual happiness--